One of the most frequently asked questions I get is about recommendations for products and ways for helping him to last longer – but also how to approach this conversation with him, or for some avoiding a direct conversation about it.
I am not a doctor or a sex therapist, so this is just my advice based off product information and customer feedback over a few years. Always speak to your doctor about any sexual health issues.
I will make my advice today product based and fairly simple. I have been wanting to right this article forever and a customer today actually prompted me to go ahead and do it so i’ll get straight into it.
Let’s start with Delay Sprays. There are quite a few on the market. Normally these sprays work by decreasing his sensitivity and simultaneously reducing the chances of premature ejaculation, such as the Stallion Slow Cum Delay.
If using one that contains a numbing agent keep in mind this can transfer to your partner if not using a condom over the top, you’d need to allow some time for product to absorb to avoid this if not using a condom as well.
In an ideal world it would be easy to just buy it and give it to your partner however this topic could be a little embarrassing to bring up. Perhaps if he ever made a joke or a reference to it you can always find a gentle way to reply to him like “Oh I saw this product advertised on KinkyFit the other day that the ladies were talking about that apparently helps guys last longer if that’s something you wanted to try” . Even using a normal lubricant can help him last longer as it takes away some of the friction and therefore he can take longer to build up that momentum.
An alternative to delay sprays to help him last longer is a cock ring as this is a fun way to introduce something into the bedroom that can help you both and not necessarily based on using for his performance. Cock rings come in all sorts of shapes and types etc, but basically there is normal ones or vibrating ones. The vibrating ones can be used for your pleasure as well, you have some where the vibrating section can stimulate your clitoris during intercourse or also with removable bullets so you have 2 in 1 toys such as the Nu Sensuelle Bullet Ring You can also get ones that will stimulate his balls and perineum, cock rings can provide a lot of versatile fun and not be centered around that “delayed orgasm” factor. Most are worn at the base of the penis to help him have harder, stronger, longer erections. There is a lot more I can say about cock rings and other fun ways to use them but i’ll save them for another article, another time.
Other fun ways you can delay & play for longer
- Spend time pleasuring her first or oral sex
- Use the “Squeeze technique” if he knows he is on edge of orgasm, to stop and squeeze and hold the head of his penis to reduce blood flow and sensation temporarily
- Try different positions in the one session, this gives you that 30-60 second break to slow things back down again – need inspo try a positions based game
- Sex doesn’t have to be about thrusting the entire time, slow it down a little, stimulate each other in other ways in between thrusting eg. take penis out and use head of penis to stimulate clitoris.